I feel so helpless and down

[oogabooga]

This is probably on to call on topic but...

If had a 10 gallon for a year now and if never been able to keep a fish for more than 3 months.

I started with a betta and everything went fine for 2 months and then I got 6 neons in my tank and it was artificial plants and stuff. 

Then my betta started scratching himself on gravel in the summer and I redid the tank.

I diddnt wash the new sand...

5 of the neons were dead in a week.

Later when things go ally started to calm down... my betta started lying at the bottom and not going up except for dinner.

I went to my life and they tested my water... my test kit was SUPER ineffective. 

My ph was 8plus.

My betta dies after 2 months of water changes to try and get it down slowly. Most of my neons(5) died as well

I decided I was going to switch to to live plants...

With one neon left I took out all the decor and got live plants and more neons 

My half my plants died within a month they had no nitrates to eat and they starved. 

The neons came sick... with neon tetra disease(it looks like it) I have another post on it. They are stressed from not enough cover and only four of them. 1 has a slightly crooked spine and a tumer like growth on his mouth. One has a small white spot on his back fun and the other has a very faint growth on it's mouth and patches were his muscles are whiter.

I fell so powerless and like I can't keep an animal alive at all. Do you think maybe try a new tank using walsted and hoping it works cause it would boost my confidence. Idk feel empty without my betta. 

[Tony s]

My first thoughts. It sounds like you’re a basic beginner, we all have made many mistakes at this point. Please don’t beat yourself up. I know it’s completely discouraging to lose animals. But there is a learning curve to this. We screw things up, we learn. We do better next time. It’s how this works. I completely understand. I did the exact same thing. Stay here, ask questions. We all like to help. For some of us, this hobby is relatively new. It’s not been that long ago we lost our own animals. We absolutely know that frustration. Trust me, it gets better. 

a few more things. Neon tetras and bettas are some of the hardest fish to keep alive for very long. They both have become way too fragile genetically from overbreeding. Neons are lucky to make it a couple of months (if they make it 3 months they’re generally fine). Bettas can last anywhere from 3 months to 3 years depending on the animal. They have a tough existence until you bring them home. You could easily have lost the majority of your fish and done everything perfectly. 
 

you tried live plants for the first time. That’s great. They didn’t make it, but you learned. You’ll do better next time. 
 

as an aside, ph is generally not a factor in if you can keep fish alive at all. There some species that are sensitive to ph but most will be okay in a decent range usually from 6 to 8. Of course there are exceptions. Usually wild caught animals need to be matched to their home habitats. Most places have harder water. 85% of the US has hard water. We keep fish just fine. More important are the values of ammonia, nitrites and nitrates for fish health. That’s why we constantly watch them. Ph kh gh are relatively constant numbers and are based on where your water originated. We usually don’t mess with them because it makes everything harder. Unless you really want a specific fish, then there are strategies to change the water. 

I know you’re completely discouraged right now, but it will get better. So if you need to, take some time. You can absolutely do this.
 

 

[Tanked]

On 4/28/2024 at 1:04 AM, oogabooga said:

Do you think maybe try a new tank using Walsted and hoping it works cause it would boost my confidence. Idk feel empty without my betta. 

NO.  

It would be best to start with the absolute basics. Please read your previous posts, and the responses.  When I was a new fish keeper I couldn't keep a fish alive more than a few months.  Information back then was a lot harder to come by, and some of the info was wrong.  You already own everything you need, and the folks here are more than happy to help.

Keep it simple:  Start with establishing a cycled tank.  This can be done with or without plants.  Keeping plants can be more complicated than keeping fish.  Not every plant will grow in every tank, so buy local.  Plants and animals purchased locally may have already adapted to your water.  Research and buy a few easy low-medium light plants.  Hornwort is a pretty forgiving. starter plant.

Stability is important:  Plants and animals need time to adjust.  Massive water changes are usually done for emergency purposes, such as an ammonia spike.  Your fish have a range of water conditions that they are comfortable in. Rapid or repeated changes in their environment causes problems.

Change one thing at a time:  If you make multiple changes, you will not know which one worked.  Make an adjustment and wait.  Adjustments for plants can take weeks to see results.

Aesop said "slow and steady wins the race".  You can do this!

 

[Tony s]

On 4/28/2024 at 1:27 PM, Tanked said:

Change one thing at a time

I think that’s the one thing we as new keepers really screw up. Most of the time things can be solved just by watching and maintaining parameters. And doing absolutely nothing else. But we panic, and then really screw things up. 

[Guupy42]

As a beginner, something pretty similar has also been happening to my tank, and I also struggle with keeping fish for a long time. It started with one guppy dying of dropsy. Then another fish gets depressed, passes away, and the cycle repeats itself, with more fish getting stressed from the loss of a tankmate. I have only really kept one guppy for over a year, but not too much longer, as he unfortunately also fell into the cycle of depression.

However, remember, when you bring the fish home, they are at least living a better life than they did at the pet stores, in the overcrowded tanks, probably with ammonia too, if you have seen the numerous fish that have passed away in the feeder fish tanks at chain stores. The fish there are mostly mass bred, and come with diseases or deformities.

Where do you get your fish? The last time I went to my local PetSmart, there were only three guppies, and only one that I liked. Sometimes, they just have an inbred batch of fish.

[oogabooga]

On 4/28/2024 at 10:27 AM, Tanked said:

NO.  

It would be best to start with the absolute basics. Please read your previous posts, and the responses.  When I was a new fish keeper I couldn't keep a fish alive more than a few months.  Information back then was a lot harder to come by, and some of the info was wrong.  You already own everything you need, and the folks here are more than happy to help.

Keep it simple:  Start with establishing a cycled tank.  This can be done with or without plants.  Keeping plants can be more complicated than keeping fish.  Not every plant will grow in every tank, so buy local.  Plants and animals purchased locally may have already adapted to your water.  Research and buy a few easy low-medium light plants.  Hornwort is a pretty forgiving. starter plant.

Stability is important:  Plants and animals need time to adjust.  Massive water changes are usually done for emergency purposes, such as an ammonia spike.  Your fish have a range of water conditions that they are comfortable in. Rapid or repeated changes in their environment causes problems.

Change one thing at a time:  If you make multiple changes, you will not know which one worked.  Make an adjustment and wait.  Adjustments for plants can take weeks to see results.

Aesop said "slow and steady wins the race".  You can do this!

 

Thx everyone and tanked my plants have started to grow back and i have seen really good growth with the helenium or whatever

[oogabooga]

On 4/28/2024 at 10:27 AM, Tanked said:

NO.  

It would be best to start with the absolute basics. Please read your previous posts, and the responses.  When I was a new fish keeper I couldn't keep a fish alive more than a few months.  Information back then was a lot harder to come by, and some of the info was wrong.  You already own everything you need, and the folks here are more than happy to help.

Keep it simple:  Start with establishing a cycled tank.  This can be done with or without plants.  Keeping plants can be more complicated than keeping fish.  Not every plant will grow in every tank, so buy local.  Plants and animals purchased locally may have already adapted to your water.  Research and buy a few easy low-medium light plants.  Hornwort is a pretty forgiving. starter plant.

Stability is important:  Plants and animals need time to adjust.  Massive water changes are usually done for emergency purposes, such as an ammonia spike.  Your fish have a range of water conditions that they are comfortable in. Rapid or repeated changes in their environment causes problems.

Change one thing at a time:  If you make multiple changes, you will not know which one worked.  Make an adjustment and wait.  Adjustments for plants can take weeks to see results.

Aesop said "slow and steady wins the race".  You can do this!

 

And iv gotten the plants under control and i now know what i was asking for all my posts and  my fish are eating (the ones with NTD) and I'm going to let them live the rest live there lives(until. euthanizing is necessary.) (maybe try with some shrimp, in like a month or two as they cant catch NTD and should hopefully act as replacement dither fish so they are not stressed at night)